some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
