I must be too annoying 4 u.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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