I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
