Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
