Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
