Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
