You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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