Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
