i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
