Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize