Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
