Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
