so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
