peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
