It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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