I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
