Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
