I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
