The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
