and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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