Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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