I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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