Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
