i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
