i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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