Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
