lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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