I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
