Who did Billy Mays play for?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize