Do you still have your period?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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