We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
