i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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