he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
