This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize