Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
