I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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