no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
We left an ass print on the piano.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
