It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize