considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
