I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
