We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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