you're like a bully in the Christmas story
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize