So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
