Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
