biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
