love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think my vagina is haunted
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
