You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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