She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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