i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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