I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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