you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Found your dick twin last night
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
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