YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
